getting back
by myeclareheartwilllast
Summary: the way eclare should be in the first episode back ! :


Eli

Eli was still in love with clare. Her beautiful blue eyes, the way she'd look at him. There was no doubt about that. He knew what he did wrong, and he wanted to fix it, but he knew it was too late. He had ruined it, and there was no one to blame but himself. He had suffocated her to the point that she didnt want him anymore. It had been almost two weeks now since she came to the hospital. He cringed at the memory of it all. All through spring break, he had gone through hell. Everytime he'd close his eyes, he'd see her. Everytime he thought about her, he could feel his heart breaking in his chest. Had she really broken up with him? did she really not love him at all? these thought would invade his mind, every second, of every day. He wanted her back so badly, but knew that he couldn't have her. He had scared her away by "talking abut forever" as she'd put it. Was that really so wrong? to love someone enough to want to think that you would last forever? he didnt know. he didnt know anything anymore. All he knew, was that he didnt think he would ever get over her. Did she still think about him? or had she completely moved on from him? the ladder seemed to make the most sense. Why would she think about him?  
>Clare<p>

She put on a brave face for everyone. She acted like none of this had effected her at all. That was all a lie though. The thought made her stomach churn just to think about it. She felt like this horrible person. The guilt of what she did would haunt her all the time. She would wake up in tears every night since the accident. She felt horrible for what she did. The truth is, she never wanted to break up with Eli. She just felt it would be best for both of them. She wasnt truly "scared" of Eli she just missed the old Eli. The one who could make her laugh at any given time, the boy who would tell her she was beautiful at least 3 times in a day. Not that he wasn't as caring anymore, he was just becoming too much. She couldnt even think about facing him at school. The thought of even seeing him in the hallway nearly brought tears to her eyes. She knew she still loved Eli, she just didnt know what to do about it.

Eli

Tonight was one of the worst nights so far. He woke up from his dream covered in sweat and a pain inside his chest. He felt like he had relived everything all over again. The dream began the night of the dance when she did't show up at their bench. It ended when she left the hospital. right after she had broken his heart. All he wanted to do was talk to her.  
>He couldnt even imagine not talking to her ever again. He didnt like to think about that though. Clare still meant everything to him, even if she had broken him.<p>

Clare

She had decided. She knew what she had to do. She was still in love with Eli and she wanted him back. She knew how hard it would be for him to accept her apology, heck, he probably actually never will. But she knew in her heart that's what she had to do. She went outside, and began her walk to his house. She wanted to change her mind but it was like her feet wouldn't stop walking. As she got closer her heart began to speed up. what if he's not even home? what if his parents wont even let me in? those thoughts made her even more nervous. She slowly, very slowly, walked up the three steps to his door. She knocked as quietly as she could. No answer. She knocked a bit louder but right as she was knocking the door began to open. It was Bullfrog,

"Clare?" he asked, confusion written all over his face.

"hi," she said, "I know I souldn't be here and Eli probably does not want to see me, but i have something i need to say to him and i would really appreciate it if you would please just let me talk to him."  
>"please..?" she added.<p>

"Clare, I dont think thats such a good idea.. I'm sorry" he said with a sad look on his face.

" I promise if I make him upset or do anything wrong, I will leave" she said, praying he would let her in.

"Alright.." he wispered with hesitation.

"Thank you !" she said as happy as she felt inside.

He opened the door to let her inside. She slowly began walking up the stairs, knowing each step she took she was that much closer to him. she began to feel my nerves moving like butterflies in her stomach. When she reached the door to his bedroom she had to stop and think for a moment. C'mon clare, you can do this! just tell him how sorry you are he has to forgive you, right ? who was she kidding?  
>why should he forgive her? she still need to tell him though. She need to get it off her chest so she can finally breathe again. She lifted her hand up and knocked on the door.<p>

"Dad, why do you alwa- " he started to say as he opened the door, but stopped once he saw her standing there.

"Clare?" he asked, " what are you doing here?"

"look Eli, I'm sorry, i know i have no right to show up here like this, but I really need to talk to you," she said looking him directly in the eyes.

"um-.. well-... alright...?" he said questioning her.

"can I sit down? " she asked timidly.

"oh yea.. ofcourse..sorry" he said not knowing how to act around her, he didnt want to come off in the wrong way.

"okay.. well here it goes.." she said looking down at her hands " I do not expect you to forgive me, at all. I know what I did was wrong. I left when things got hard and that was not fair to you. You were nothing but amazing to me and abandoned you right when you needed me most. You were going through a lot and I didn't exactly know how to handle it. so I left. There isnt anything harder that I have in my whole life than to leave you there in that hospital. It broke my heart. But i felt like it would help you more if I left. Like I said, I in no way expect you to fogive me. I just miss you so much and I wish I hadn't left you that night and we could still be the way we were before things started to go downhill. I want you back. I want to be able to call you my boyfriend because you were the greatest person in my life"

she finally looked up from her hands at him. He looked at her with hurt in his eyes that slowly turned into something different and before she knew it, his lips were being crushed against hers. It was different than any kiss they have ever shared together. Better. Better than their first kiss, better than the kiss they shared in the library and even better than the kiss in his room. It had all of the feelings from the last two weeks. As he pulled away his eyes never left hers.

"wow." she said breathing heavily.

"you still want me to be your boyfriend?" he asked, " even though i suffocated you and made you feel uncomfortable?"

"Eli," she said " you were not suffocating me, I may have said that but it wasnt truely how I felt, I honestly don't even know why I said that, I am so sorry for that. But Eli, there is nothing i want more than to call you my boyfriend again" she said looking at him.

" And there is nothing I want more than for you to be my girlfriend again" he said as a smirk appeared on his face.

"Really?" she asked genuinly wondering if tha'st really what he wanted.

"Really." he said.

"I love you" she said wanting to know if he still felt the same way.

"I love you too Clare'" he said.

Before either of them could say anything else Clare pushed Eli back on his bed and began kissing him. He flipped them over so he was ontop of her holding his weight up. It felt as though nothing had ever ended their relationship and they were back to the way they were before. Just the way they wanted it to be.


End file.
